UNDERSTANDING MALE DEPRESSION

SINCE MOST MALES RARELY ADMIT OPENLY WHEN THEY HAVE PROBLEMS IT IS EASY FOR A SYMPTOM SUCH AS DEPRESSION TO GO UNRECORDED AS AN ISSUE THAT MEN DEAL WITH. TYPICALLY MEN DO NOT REACH OUT FOR HELP TO EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS. THEY DON’T EVEN REACH OUT TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY SO REACHING OUT TO A STRANGER IS VIRTUALLY UNIMAGINED.

I just recently read an article posted by the Mayo Clinic called, “Male depression: Understanding the issues.” Here is the direct link in case you would like to read the complete article for yourself:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/male-depression/MC00041

This article confirms my personal experience. I have personally sensed this feeling. Rather than proactively doing something to affectively deal with the situation I tried to ignore it, or overcome it mentally by the power of will. Unfortunately my will power was not strong enough to override this ailment so I was left with holding the ball not knowing what to do with it.

Since I pride myself in being a strong individual, admitting that I could not affectively deal with this issue was my first problem. Until I convinced myself to seek outside help I would remain in the dark. On the other hand, the quicker I would reach out to some sort of medical or other clinical help the quicker I would be put on a path of healing.

As typical of most males I tried to analyze my own problems. If I can’t find the answers I might try to wait it out if the suffering is not too unbearable…Only when the suffering doesn’t go away am I forced out of my “pride shell” to see a doctor.

Since I personally have a few friends that I can talk to about my issues usually they will admit that they have faced something similar or know of someone else who has. Just by reaching outside of my own mental zone of safety I was able to start on a path of discovery that led to a source of possible cures for what I might have been facing. Staying behind my own “pride walls” only led to more of the same “nothingness.” Depression hides behind our pride.

Male depression may go undiagnosed for several reasons, according to the Mayo Clinic:
• Reluctance to discuss depression symptoms
• Seeing mental illness as a threat to your masculinity.
• Masking depression symptoms.
• Resisting mental health treatment.

The article went on to list some of the signs and symptoms more likely to occur with male depression:
• Violent or abusive behavior
• Inappropriate rage
• Escapist behavior, such as over-involvement in work of sports
• Risky behavior, such as reckless driving
• Sexual liaisons
• Alcohol or substance abuse
• More frequent thoughts of suicide

“Having such symptoms can make it more difficult to link them to depression, making diagnosis and treatment harder,” according to the Mayo article.

What men need to learn in general is how to reach out for help without going through denial and senseless pride. If you have strange symptoms and see yourself doing things that are not your usual pattern you need to establish a fail-safe mechanism. If you have a best buddy bonded with trust, ask them to assist you.

Make a pack (pre-agreed upon) with a buddy to handle the tough issues for each other whenever they may occur. If you do not have such a friend then that is a project for you to make an effort to achieve. Creating such a bond is one of the most precious assets of life. If you do not have such a person then you are out on a limb without a safe way out of your situation. You are putting yourself up the creek without a paddle. It doesn’t have to be like that!

Guys, this is a new day. We have to start living and pondering life differently. We no longer need to suffer alone in darkness. Having a problem or condition is not necessarily a sign of weakness. Besides, who cares what people think if it means that you need to remain in a holding pattern of suffering. In reality men may fake holding back pain in public, but we are not lovers of pain. The fact of the matter is that we hate it! If you’re suffering, reach out. Find a cure and rid yourself of the problem. Go to the source of the problem; don’t get stuck on the symptoms. You are not the doctor nor qualified to either treat or heal yourself.

In truth male depression goes directly against the nature of most males. It forces them to admit something they never want to admit: it feels like a threat to their masculinity. It forces you to bury the problem even deeper making it harder to cure and it works against your mind where you think you should be able to figure things out. In this case being well is worth more to you than your pride. But, if you insist upon being prideful, how is that working for you?